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CHAD Chats — Safety Third!


CHAD Chats 3: Safety Third!

Thursday, August 16, 2012
@ The Jack London Bar
529 SW 4th Ave, Portland, OR

Tickets on sale now!

CHAD Chats are back, and they're safer than ever! The CHAD Institute, a not-yet-profitable foundation devoted to the creation and destruction of knowledge, presents SAFETY THIRD, their newest program of satirical PowerPoint presentations from the finest minds in Humor, Science, History, Child Slavery, and Personal Empowerment. Inquiring minds and thirsty lips are invited to seize control of their host bodies and converge on The Jack London Bar on August 16th at 8pm. We assure you that all necessary safety precautions have been taken and that there is absolutely nothing to worry about.

This time around enjoy a series of all-new Chats, by new CHAD participants and returning favorites:

  • Global inspiration pioneer and internal power mentor LANCE BANKS — creator of LanceLife, the Comprehensive Total Life System — will re-empower us with a life-skills demonstration entitled "I've Got Your Back";
  • STEPHANIE PURTLE, comedian and V.P. of Viacom's Community Rehabilitation Action Program (CRAP), will unveil exciting new advances in the suppression of teenagers, in "Service Learning through Active Visioning Educating Reality-TV Youth (SLAVERY)!";
  • Historian and comedic thaumaturge PHILIP SCHALLBERGER will explore the curing of ailments both demonic and bodily with his talk "Medieval Medicine: The Cutting Edge";
  • Writer, cartoonist, and costume-maker MARK RUSSEL will muse on the fan-fictional nature of ancient Christian texts in "What Is the Bible?";
  • Famous Author and CHAD co-flounder MYKLE HANSEN will revisit his exploration of life's toughest issue with a newly updated version of his talk "Death: Is It For You?";
  • Plus a possible post-mortem appearance by astrophysicist and internet meme CARL SAGAN.
  • Comedian and punofficial CHAD spokseperson WHITNEY STREED will deftly guide the evening to its predetermined conclusion, during which time not one single person will be in harm's way.

Presentations begin safely at 8:30pm (doors at 8pm) on Thursday, August 16th at The Jack London Bar, located at 529 SW 4th Ave in the basement of the Rialto Poolroom. Tickets are $10 at the door, or $7 in advance from Brown Paper Tickets.

FOR MORE INFORMATION, contact mykle (at) or streed.jokes (at), follow @thinkchad on Twitter, or navigate to our interweb sitenet at .